Whether it’s a Barbie or a Power Ranger, some kids want nothing more than to play with their dolls. But these vintage dolls don’t have the luxury of being played with, and for a very good reason.

Back in the day, toy companies must have thought that these dolls would be welcomed into the hearts of children everywhere. But things must have been very different back then, if these monstrosities were actually considered cute!

1. This doll is definitely up to no good.

01-eyebrows

2. Good lord, those teeth. It’s like she wants to eat my soul.

02-smile

3. Why did they have to make three of them?

03-triplets

4. Just what every kid wants for Christmas — a creepy gnome to watch them sleep.

04-gnome-massage

5. This doll was never not creepy.

05-blue-eyes

6. It’s like he’s trying to suck your essence out with his eyes.

06-lazy-eye

7. I can’t imagine that this ventriloquist got a whole lot of work.

07-ventriliquist

8. Imagine this abomination crawling towards you in the middle of the night.

07a-crawling

9. I don’t know what’s going on here, but I want no part of it.

08-mirror-mirror

10. Who in their right mind would actually give this to their kid?

08a-zombie

11. Get it away from me.

09-japanese

12. Soon he will become one of them!

10-possessed

13. Oh no, it’s a whole army of them…

11-doll-army

14. It’s like they were preparing for a global campaign of horror.

12-many-heads

15. Creepy Factor: Maximum!

13-babies

16. If any doll was ever going to steal your soul, it would be this one.

15-black-eyes

17. Ok, that’s it. I can’t take anymore of these!

14-cant-sleep

These dolls are legitimately unsettling. Can we please ban the production of dolls forever? Thank you.

Share these creepy abominations with your friends below!