It’s hard to imagine that there’s anyone out there who doesn’t harbor some sort of secret. Even if these secrets aren’t “deep” or “dark,” everybody has something that they’d prefer the rest of the world not to know.
That being said, it can often feel like a burden to keep something hidden for too long. How else are you supposed to get these things off your chest so you can move on?
Luckily, that’s how the internet—and all the anonymity that it offers—can help. One Reddit user decided to ask “What’s your secret that could literally ruin your life it it came out?” and the answers were fascinating!
1. “Two and a half years ago I was in dire financial straights [sic], so I sold my home to keep my struggling business afloat. I neglected to tell the owners that they have an 800 sq. ft. bunker on the property that I built about seven years ago. The bunker that I’ve called home since I sold it.”
“The entrance to it is well-hidden, but I still come and go very early/very late in the day. I’m a single man who keeps to himself. I’m now in a situation where I could move somewhere else, but I love this hidden paradise so much.”
2. “I speak two languages so every time I received a new essay I would browse the topic in my own language and translate the text word-by-word to English then submitted it. No one ever caught me for plagiarism before.”
3. “I cut off all contact with everyone I know and moved to Kenya, I tell people a fake name and a fake background and have made it appear to my family that I died on boat trip in the Pacific. No I am not joking. I am dead in the United States.”
4. “I run a cake business. I charge people hundreds for wedding cakes… every last one is made using Pillsbury cake mix I buy for $1 a box at Walmart. I suck at baking. Every time I’ve ever tried to make a cake from scratch it sucked. But baking is like… my whole deal. My friends all call me the cake girl.”
“It’s like my whole life is a lie. People compliment my cakes all the time. Telling me how delicious they are. Telling me it’s so much better than box mix cake. Telling me they could never bake a cake so delicious. Well guess what? For $1, they too can make a cake just as delicious…”
5. I once helped out my a female friend’s family by taking care of their cat for a week. Every day for a week, I would go over there and snoop around their house. I found my friend’s diary, and proceeded to read the entire thing. I used this information to get her to like me, and she is currently my wife.
6. “I faked the last two years of college education. My parents put so much pressure on me I couldn’t handle it (I was suffering from severe depression and anxiety) so I faked it all. Lied to everyone. Made up fake transcripts. I just got my foot in the door in my desired field thanks to a friend as they hired me as a subordinate.”
“This place only hires college grads but no one double checked my credentials since I was recommended. My hopes is that if I need to find another job I’ll have been at this place long enough to get it by experience alone (I work for a very prestigious company). I’m not bad at my job. I’m actually quite good. But my fear is eventually I’ll hit a wall and the lie will come to light. No one has known this for the better part of a decade.”
7. “I once took a **** In the bathtub and then realising what a horrible mistake I’d made, I flung poo into a hole In the wall. My parents renovated and patched up the hole. So now there is a ~15 year old turd in between the bathroom and kitchen wall of my childhood home…”
8. “…I have a blind brother. When we were young, I used to get so frustrated at all the extra attention he received and how I had to be more responsible with my sibling than my peers. So, when my brother and I would go play, go to the store, or just generally go anywhere without adults, I would abandon him somewhere unfamiliar to him.”
“Then, I would stand off quietly and watch the anxiety set in as he tried to figure out where he was and what was going on. Also, I was really intelligent as a child and knew that was my ticket to attention. When I would ‘help’ my brother with his homework, I would teach him all the wrong answers, so that I could continue being the smarter sibling. Today, my brother is my best friend. He goes to college and lives by himself. He’s become one of the most intelligent men I’ve ever met…”
9. “I hate all of my friends. Literally. I don’t have anything in common with any of them, and don’t care. But I’m too scared to be alone and have no one else to go to so I keep hanging around with them.”
Hopefully this person makes a some real friends soon!
10. “…Hugs to all who need it, I hope you find the strength to overcome your problems. My own secret, is that I’m still deeply in love with my (now married with kids) first love, nothing will ever happen and it is ridiculously hurtful, but w/e, life goes on.”
11. “Some background first: I don’t like being touched or hugged, and I’m incredibly uncomfortable with intimacy in general. When I was in the 8th grade, a bunch of girls in my class convinced me they had a friend who fancied me (they said she had seen me somewhere and thought I was cute).”
“Faked a MSN account and they talked to me every night for a few months, invited me out to the movies and (obviously) didn’t show up, then revealed to the whole grade that I had been tricked into having an ‘imaginary’ girlfriend… I’ve since met such a fantastic woman, someone who makes me incredibly happy. I love her very much, she loves me, and she’s helping me get used to the idea of feeling valuable and trusting people (or at least one person).”
12. “I still have ‘imaginary friends.’ I’m almost 30. I lost them for a while. I don’t know why or how, but they were gone. I couldn’t see them or hear them any more, not the way I used to when I was younger. It made me was miserable. I kept hoping for a way to get them back.”
“Two weeks ago, I somehow managed to finally break through whatever the barrier was. I have spent the past two weeks hanging out with, and talking to, a character from a well-known TV show. I can’t really ‘see’ him visually, but I can see him with my mind’s eye. He goes almost everywhere with me. He’s sitting on my bed right now, waiting for me to get off my computer. (I promised I would get off a little while ago, but I had to check reddit one last time).”
13. “I have been pretending to be colorblind to everyone I have ever known, including my own parents since I was in 3rd grade. I am now 28 years old. I even convinced an optometrist of it.”
Hey, at least this one is harmless!